I had the pleasure of listening in on a Zoom press roundtable with relationship expert Tracy McMillan and it was so profound! We met a couple of years ago when she came here to Atlanta to promote her new show on the OWN network called, “Family or Fiancé”. During the interview, she gave me some great advice about relationships and I learned so much from her.
Yesterday afternoon, Tracy spilled the tea on the new season and what viewers could expect! She also told us some red flags to look out for going into relationships like attachment systems, doing the work, and dealing with ex’s. Its was so good and inside I listed some things that really stood out to me! I wish each and every one of you a healthy and loving relationship out there and I am even working on myself for my next partner lol! Enjoy, peace and blessings!
- Be as honest as you can. You have to deal with your issues. Being radically honest, gets you the breakthroughs.
- In every episode there is something you can relate to. You will see yourself somewhere. When you witness seeing something, it’s a healing process happening to you as well.
- You will see how people deal with an issue like a past relationship. When its exes involved and they have an ex and they have an impact, how do couples deal with that? How do that affect the current relationship.
- When people partner we are activating our attachment system. When we are born we are attached to our caregiver. Without the attachment there is no food etc. That’s the number one thing people do is attach. We grow up and we find partners, whatever language we learn, we start speaking with our partner. Your primary figure partner is now your attachment. If you have issues with unattaching from someone like a parent, you will have trouble. It’s one of the biggest issues. For example a mother instead of your partner. Insecure attachments. Once you understand your partner is number one, if he cant put you in the number position its not going to work. You can not avoid it. thats what a marriage is. Prince Harry picked Meghan instead of his family is a perfect example.
- Most Challenging? On of the biggest issues was one of the couples didn’t want to do the work. They want to look a certain way instead of getting real. They don’t want to move forward. They partner do but they don’t. Some people just don’t want to go there. In one episode, the male had a breakthrough but the female did not.
“Family or Fiancé” returns to OWN this month for another explosive season of couples seeking the blessings of their disapproving families before their upcoming weddings.
Under the guidance of host and relationship expert Tracy McMillan, the couples and extended families live under one roof for three days and participate in activities designed to strengthen their bond, unpack their differences, and show some very complicated relationships in a whole new light. In the end, the experience will either confirm the families’ concerns, leaving these couples to reconsider their unions, or provide the families with a renewed understanding and persuade them to give their blessings to the couple’s happily ever after. I will be apart of the roundtable discussion next week with Tracy, make sure to stop back to read all about it!
Tracy McMillan is a television writer, relationship expert and author, whose credits include Mad Men, Good Girls Revolt, Marvel’s Runaways, and United States of Tara. She’s the author of three books – a memoir, I Love You and I’m Leaving You Anyway; a novel, Multiple Listings; and a relationship book, Why You’re Not Married… Yet. The latter is based on the viral blog Why You’re Not Married, which for more than two years was the most-viewed article in the history of the Huffington Post. Tracy’s made numerous television appearances, including Oprah Winfrey’s Super Soul Sunday, NBC’s dating show Ready For Love, The Today Show, Access Hollywood Live, Katie and more. Her TedX talk The Person You Really Need to Marry has more than 9.7 million views.
Tracy lives in Los Angeles and is the mother of a 21-year-old son, a senior at Lewis & Clark College.